Feeling home abroad

You are moving abroad. You are taking the big step and starting a new life. Or, at least you are considering it. You will finally have a chance to see the world, have a fantastic new job, learn a different language, meet interesting people, experience a new culture and have more free time with your family. You are so excited! Bye bye old habits, hello new world!

But, moving abroad also turns your life upside down. You will go through a roller coaster of emotions. You are leaving everything behind and starting a whole new life with a new identity and new balances. There are so many things to organize and to get used to. It may feel fantastic and overwhelming at the same time.

After all, moving abroad (whether it is for the short or the long term) is a huge life changing event that you and your family need to adjust to.

Most of the time these processes go naturally, but sometimes you may need some support to realize "You are not going crazy!", "This is normal." and "Yes, you can overcome (most) of these feelings.". Then it is nice to know that you are not the only one in the world facing these issues.

Emotions or questions you may encounter when relocating.

Before

You (and your partner) are considering to take on a new challenge abroad. You can't wait to "pack up your bags and go", but you are not sure if you are ready to leave everything behind. These are confusing moments.

A good preparation is very important:
  • Getting confident about the decisions you are making.
  • Making a realistic plan on how you want your future to look like.
  • How to deal with breaking the news to family and saying your goodbyes.
  • Preparing yourself and your children emotionally for the move.

After all, you want your move to be successful and you want to be able to enjoy it!

After

Once you have moved to a new country you are likely to experience some kind of a "holiday feeling". Everything is wonderful, new and exciting and you are full of energy to get organized and deal with the practical issues.

But after a while when daily life has started, you may experience difficulties in feeling at home. Even though you have everything you want and you are supposed to feel great... you don't!

It is not uncommon to feel strong or mixed emotions:
  • You are not feeling at home, in fact...you don't know where home should be.
  • You are feeling overwhelmed ("Where do I start?", "Where do I go?").
  • You are passive and tired and everything takes more time than back home.
  • You are feeling homesick and lonely.
  • You are feeling doubts ("Why did I come here?", "Why did I put my children through this?").
  • You have a low self-esteem.

Or have lots of questions:
  • How do I support my children in the adaptation process ("Third Culture Kids")?
  • How do I act in my new role as an international employee / trailing spouse / stay-at-home mom?
  • How can I find a new balance in the relationship with my partner and in my family?
  • How do I develop a new social network?

Understanding your emotions and adapting your ways is key to success in a new country!